It will be a cold day in hell before I recognize Missour-ah!

“Now, my story begins in nineteen-dickety-two. We had to say ‘dickety’ ‘cause the Kaiser had stolen our word ‘twenty.’ I chased that rascal to get it back, but gave up after dickety-six miles...”

You know, that reminds me of the time I caught the ferry over to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe. So, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. Now, to take the ferry cost a nickel; and in those…

“Just like the time I could have met Mr. T at the mall. The entire day, I kept saying, ‘I’ll go a little later, I’ll go a little later...’ And when I got there, they told me he just left. And when I asked the mall guy if he’ll ever come back again, he said he didn’t know. Well, I’m never going to let something like…

The question is, was this a deliberate fraud? Or was it just a dating site gone wrong?

Wrong. Also, you’re racist.

You started the political rant by dogging Americans out of left field when this was a European, so whatever puss.

Because only American kids can be spoiled, or something

Ever since hearing that. I just would have loved to hear him as Shrek. I think he could have done a far better shot. And added alot more heart to it. I never liked that voice that mike meyers did.

This sketch does not get nearly enough praise, but I think it might be his best:

I thought Noomi Rapace was way better than Roonie Mara as Lisbeth and Michael Nyqvist a better Michael Blomqvist. I watched all three of the Swedish films with English subtitles, and it's pretty obvious the Swedishness of it all. Sort of like "Let the Right One In."

Well, Guardians should have been Best Picture, so maybe he has a point.

His role as Dr. David Kibner in Kaufman's re-make of Invasion of the Body Snatchers shouldn't be overlooked: the rational psychologists whose first concern is for the well-being of his friend.

She's only "toxic" to the small community of angry gamerbros who want to paint her every action as being that of the devil. Kind of like the way Barack Obama is "toxic" to Tea Party members and christian fundamentalists. If you spend all day in that echo chamber, you might convince yourself everyone in the world hates…

You are insufferable. If you don't like it, why are you here?

If someone else did, she'd be harassed, threatened and hated too. She's only controversial because a certain segment of the population hates every woman who speaks out. Every feminist in the public eye is just as despised. The problem isn't Anita Sarkeesian. It's angry misogynists.

You guys would call anyone who heads the movement too toxic, so you're not really worth listening to.

She's toxic?

You're delusional.

How dare he report on an event relevant to this site's topic. HOW DARE HE?

Dude, you're on Kotaku. There are so many men here angry at women for threatening their power, of course they're gonna clump together and start screaming.