wait, the Giants outfielder is named ‘Perry Meth’?

“did you pack this yourself?”

Had a friend in high school who got arrested for the same joke. This was pre-9/11. They’ve never found this joke funny

Psst. You should probably check McGwire’s 2001 stats.

It’s embarrassing that a sprots website would publish a post that suggests that it may have possibly have been anyone BUT Hosmer’s ball.

“I’m not sure what Hosmer means by ‘turn around.’”

You can always tell you landed a great joke when both people listening to it are immediately horrified and you shriek “no that’s funny though.”

Obviously the first three tracks of The Joshua Tree are objectively correct, but I will happily try to come up with an alternative.

So many valid answers...

Filbert and 22nd is “only” 31.5% , Baxster is 32%.

Something I’ve learned off-roading: a head-on video never looks as steep as the real thing.

Can the Onion be considered journalism though? I would see it more in line with a comedy sketch using current events as it’s base, so it would have to fall in line with the writers guild, not journalism.

Now mold them together as though they were passionately French kissing and you have the perfect artistic representation of Cristiano Ronaldo

Still doesn’t look like him, but it looks more trendy human and less Gary Busey. I guess that’s an improvement.

100 bucks for a lunch box!?

100 bucks for a lunch box!?

He’ll always be Dennis from Head of the Class to me.

Topologically speaking, a straw is a coffee cup.

I said it in another response, but let me ask you this: Tim Cook’s total comp was right around $100 million last year. Do you honestly think he brings more value than their best executive with a $2 million dollar raise to become CEO + 490 new hires making $200k/year would? If the answer is yes, then there’s no point…

Well Yeah, Marc’s a total merde stupide

If you could only play commercial jingles while getting it on, what would be your go-to to create the sexiest vibes?