A guy at a party once informed me (a Muslim woman) that I wear a hajeeb, and that a story about the prophet Muhammad is called a “fatwa.” And he would NOT BACK DOWN.
Cmas
Cmas
She was just SO FIRM and unwavering, for a moment I doubted math and the universe.
I was at a Bob Evans several years ago with my grandfather, who paid the bill by giving the money to the waitress, even though you’re supposed to bring the receipt up to the register. (This happened all the time apparently because this is a retirement community in Florida.) The waitress, who has been great, goes to…
Well, yeah - two intermediate products of that reaction are hydrazine (which can heat up to a boil without warning) and hydrochloric acid (which is goddamn hydrochloric acid). Clean the latrine, clean the mess, clean the meat off your bones if you put your mind to it.
EVERYTHING!!!!! This post had EVERYTHINGGGG!!!!!!!!
So you’re saying she was the best bartender ever, right?
A few years ago, I was at a decent restaurant that mostly focused on wine and beer, but did have a fully stocked bar. I ordered an old fashioned, since I was on a bourbon kick. The bartender looked a bit confused, but said she’d look it up and make me one.
Along the Gestapo/Gazpacho story line...
After 9/11 my then husband was in auxilary NYPD in the Emergency Services Unit (he was also an EMT). During the Republican National Convention they had a bunch of ambulances and emergency personnel sitting at the Jacob Javits Center. Because my then husband looked obviously like…
No substitutions.
I have to shamefully admit that while cleaning a shower stall in the basement of a house with very hard water, my mom did the chlorine gas thing back in the day and messed up her lungs something fierce. She always ends the story with “But oh my the shower stall was GLEAMING WHITE when I finished!”
Oh no, I am allergic to crunchy red. Can you hold the crunchy red?
I was going to say April Ludgate, but not even that comes close.
I’m pretty sure calling in dead is a Massachusetts thing, because I’ve seen it happen at two very different jobs.
It’s a crunchy red.
The Subway trainee sounds like she has a bright career ahead of her in adult films if the sandwich gig doesn’t work out.
No Substitutions for You!
What’s your soup du jour of the day? And does it come in a monogrammed thermos?
Wat.
Mmmmm, Gestapo soup.
My first job was at a restaurant where all the employees were kids from my high school. I was the dishwasher. We still employed the three sink system, meaning I was adequately shackled with the proper “Work is Hard and It Sucks, But Goldurnit it Was Much Harder In MY DAY” attitude that has helped me successfully and…