The first thing I ever quit was cheerleading in grade 10. My commitment to cheering waned considerably after football because I had gotten a part time job and, frankly, the cheer uniforms for basketball were a hideous mustard polyester abomination. The faculty advisor for cheerleading was explaining the importance…

Josh Hutcherson was really selling the "I'm just here, having a conversation with JLaw" thing and she was all, "I thought we were just reading lines here." He has a future in this sort of thing, he should give Sarah McLoughlin a call.

Yes, he's back and charming but will he prosecute Cheney or Bush? No. Will he finally prosecute bankers? No. Will he go after the District Attorney who willing put a lying witness on the stand? No. Obama concedes so much that it's frustrating, but here we go again, showing off that charisma but no balls.

"THIS IS MY SECOND TERM. IMPEACH ME. GO AHEAD I'LL WAIT."

Yes yes yes please! With Edris Elba as James Bond and Stephan Hawking as the villain, we are looking at a Bond film that I will champion loudly and insistently to see, even when the people I'm going with are my friends who don't really like action movies and always want to see some romantic bullshit because it's…

Me and that guy have a VERY different idea of what WASPs are apparently. I would never put James Bond in that category. When i hear WASP, i think passive aggressive dagger smilers from new england.

Deamus is real! It's a Christmas miracle!

I have one more thing to say. Isha, I don't mean to pick on you but can we call this what it is? It isn't a "shower scandal," it's allegations of mass sexual assault and harassment. We want to change things and say words matter? Let's call this shit the fuck out.

And cell phone hacks, upskirts, etc...all the same…

Honestly, I don't understand how feet are supposed to be comfortable in high heels. They're angled so more pressure is in the balls of your feet and your toes get scrunched up, no? I once asked some shoe experts how to wear heels without pain and they were like, just deal with it.

No hooker? Very disappointed that a hooker wasn't involved. My old boss love skanky quasi-hookers.

Yeah, and he implies that the "approachable" coffee is somehow worse/less interesting? Shouldn't all your coffee options be approachable? Because they should all taste good, just different?

This is when.

You've got to be fucking kidding me. Almost every post-20-week abortion occurs because there is a catastrophic failure in the pregnancy or defect in the fetus or imminent threat to the life of the mother. Anytime someone says, "Abortions should be banned after 20 weeks because of fetal pain," I hear, "I would rather…

-_- Dear Congress: Hi, person who has a uterus here. I know you don't know much about how reproduction works but let me share a quick story. See, I don't have the lining of my uterus anymore. My uterus is still there, and so are my ovaries and all that, so I ovulate just as much as the next ovary-having person does,…

Several jobs ago, I ordered a sushi appetizer at a nice company dinner. The president/CEO's secretary (who I later learned was having an affair with him) was a woman of extremely limited education and experience, and she was hyper-aware of this fact and constantly paranoid that other people were making fun of her. She…

Another moment of Einstein being wonderful:

Best postscript in a personal letter, ever.

I honestly think Warner Bros of all people has the right take on the debate

The thing is that telling a student that they have to go to the front office to contact a parent about every practice time change, forgotten key/lunch, important date, sickness, reminder, etc is just telling them to waste everyone's time. The front office ladies have more important things to do than call people's…