The lightweight materials on my car are just where shit's missing... :/

If they really want to get rid of them, all they need to do is swap the VIN, and let Homeland Security take care of the rest.

I45 traffic to downtown was a mess. I couldnt get my heard of cows to their pings this morning in time.

For all the other flaws, I don't think we stand for that shit down here in Texas.

So, Midtown Houston?

Deported to Detroit?

Im pretty sure jesus would fly bro

So here's the thing about the V60. When I was a kid, Volvo wagons could be purchased by average income earners. Hell, we had one in 1983, at the same time my parents were trying to manage a 21% mortgage (the early '80s were scary). We didn't make lots of money. Today you'd call us middle-middle class.

Haha. Yeah, and also: ran when parked, check engine light is on but it's just the gas cap, won't start but all it needs is a new battery. Oh and civic corolla jdm accord prius lexus acura ford mustang jeep audi lexus honda dishwasher garden gnome.

I think PVC is probably cheaper, lighter, and easier to work with. I'd go with that.

There are different levels of squishy. I am very squishy compared to Kaleb.

Stuck in a rock between two hard places

Whenever a Jalopnik article feels just a wee bit too perfect, I have to scroll up and see if Doug is the author.

How is the Cooper S impractical? It's got a hatch and should still get respectable MPG, yeah?

The SS Orlove coming in to port

You may want to factor something about needing a backseat. Ie, do you have kids now or expect them shortly? It chose a Miata for me, which would be ideal except for the presence of tiny people.

I tweeted at you from @CKFairbanks, but my suggestion is better explain in more than 140 characters.

Yeah, they swapped the Twizzlers out for bendy straws.

The word "engineered" is pissed that you used it in connection with this car.