RE: Zywiec and Eastern European concert halls: if you live in NYC and haven’t spent a night at a Brighton Beach catering hall, you need to do this ASAP.

“You’ll ruin my radio career? How are you going to do that?”—and Sherman doubled down: “Video.”

Finally, Richard Sherman admits to pass interference.

Even with my username I can’t fathom wanting to rub one out in a public stadium. To each their own, but time and place man, time and place.

I’m sure they will keep coming, this is just the tip.

Personal foul, leading with the head. The player has been ejected.

The balls will be placed at the spot of the foul.

“Hey gals, anybody wanna Jack Murphy?”

I just don’t understand how this could happen...

Another year, another deflated ball scandal...

We are aware of the disturbing actions of an Elite security staff member at Sunday’s game. We apologize to any fans who may have witnessed the incident. We promise that you’ll be able to go back to beating the holy shit out of each other in the stands without such distractions.

-gate is for your parents’ scandals. This, obviously, should be known as DickieLeaks.

Lotta good masturbation jokes so far. Hope they keep coming.

Someone’s not impressed

Meanwhile, there’s 22 men on the field making millions for taking blows to the head while this guy gets paid jack.

“Hire this man.”

Elite has employed thousands of people over the past 21 years, insists on the highest moral standards

Hey, at least someone with the Chargers is good in the pocket.

(Read in Gruden voice) Look at the motor on this guy. He gets up in there and starts banging around and BOOM he just unloads. I love the get off on this guy.

I can’t wait for a two year investigation and scandal. I shall call it...FapGate™