“I fully endorse jbud and his witticisms.”

Well if Florida State can escape the law in the town of Tallahassee, I’m sure Real Madrid is safe on their own property in Madrid.

Going out on New Year’s Eve is like jerking off — it’s a lot of buildup for a relatively short payoff, and you’re going to be disgusted with yourself when it’s over, either way. I’ll stay home and countdown from 10 by myself, thank you very much.

It’s just refreshing that a Real Madrid player actually operates a vehicle. Most can't get past the vanity mirror.

Whats up with chicks want to go from place to place to place to place to place. Like fuck that. Why are we on some sort of new years eve adventure hike.

I love how everyone replying to you is assuming you’ve never gotten laid or will never get laid again.
Pretty sure that means they’re extremely jealous of your situation, lol

A Colombian with an addiction to speed? Well, I don’t know what to believe in anymore.

Contrary to popular belief, 124MPH is not that fast.

124 in an R8?

Private security v. Government security.

Useless underpaid assholes v. Useless overpaid assholes.

That one’s obvious.

“I can do for you what I did for Ryan Howard and Ryan Zimmerman!” is the worst drug dealer pitch of all time.

♫ HGH you work so gooooood ♫

This play in 2015:

Last word belonged to Charles Woodson until Jim Nantz opened his dick hole to ruin it.

I like your Idea but heres one better.

Aww. This guy typed up a whole bunch of stuff that all just means “I love fundamentals.”

this is why we dont have nice things.

Wow dude! You got this thing totally figured out!

We should all stop jumping to conclusions and wait for the fax to come out.