That whole hypothetical falls apart right at the beginning where they suggest that anyone living in a town whose major employer was a chicken processing plant found a thriving market for fucking DOG WALKING. That’s where there big city upbringing betrays them.

Look at those skinny arms. She couldn’t lift a bat with those arms.

Little Gideon just doesn’t give a shit does he? I think I’d put money on him saying “nigger” before Trump does.

Notice how Doc Watkins tries to simultaneously diss The Root and compare his little school thing to an accredited university? That’s some pro-level weasel shit right there.

Damn. God damn. Breathtaking.

East/West is bad but the North/South Corridor is a nightmare. I can’t wait until Tacoma is connected to Seattle with light rail.

Of course you’re not saying that, but your implication game is strong. But just keep sing that “if you just comply, everything will be all right” song. Keep pushing “respectability”.

They clearly have little regard for human life and you think a little thing like “compliance” is going to get in their way? Maybe they don’t shoot him. Maybe, instead, they beat the crap out of him for the inconvenience and leave him severely injured or debilitated for the rest of his life. Or maybe, they decide that…

So is he accusing you of annihilating negroes or of being a negro who annihilates because I would definitely put that second one on my LinkedIn profile.

The Roughnecks probably wouldn’t raise any eyebrows.

This has to be the WORST fucking stand-up routine ever. None of his “jokes” land. Even Andy Kaufman had his moments.

I really hope their cross-town rivals are the Falling Prices.

It was my little girl’s birthday so it was real easy to ignore the Super Bowl. Still ate like I was afraid there’d be no more food though.

At this rate (if God and Jesus hate us), we’ll see him wearing a version of his old military school uniform and putting David Clarke to shame by the start of 2019.

Every time I think of Michael Rapaport, I remember when he was punched to death by Nic Cage in 1995's Kiss of Death, House of Pain playing in the background.

You remember that kid growing up who claimed he had an uncle that worked at Nintendo so he knew all the secret codes? Remember when he told you there was a way to give Guile a gun in Street Fighter II? How he had all the best toys but he wasn’t allowed to show them to anyone? How he had a Canadian girlfriend but she…

I didn’t watch because I can’t stand his fucking voice or his fucking face. I can’t stand the smug emanating off of the Republican members of congress or the thinly disguised hatred they have for us. I could barely tolerate hearing it on the news this morning and then they reported that polls indicated that 80% of…

Doby came after Walker and Robinson. So how is Doby the first?

They’re like Pokemon, Damon. A Tomilahren evolves into a Brittmchenry and a Brittmchenry evolves into an Annecoulter or a Lauraingram, depending on a few outside factors.

Someone on Twitter claimed that the team name and mascot were in honor of them having the 1st Native American in the league and so I ask (as I did then): If hypothetically, Cleveland had the 1st Black player in the league, would they have named themselves something like the “Blackies” and today, would we be arguing…