Well, i know what i'm making for my office holiday we-hate-you-so-a-real-party-is-out potluck this year.

I'm doing this next year:

Dear Brides: I hate weddings. Truly, I do. Showers too. When you're looking to trim the invitation list, please scratch my name off first. I'm sure you'll be as relieved as I'll be. You don't want me showing up, getting too drunk too early, and hitting on all the men, even your weird Uncle Charlie, and all the married…

It's like a racial Victor Victoria.

Loose vagina is just what men say to make themselves feel better about having a skinny penis.

You can still raise money for cops who kill unarmed children, though. I will never, ever use this piece of crap site for anything again. GoFundMe can GoFuckItself.

But at the end of the day, aren't they ALL winners?

THANK YOU. I just typed this tirade about failed states and deleted it because it didn't make sense. We westerners love to go in, kick other peoples' leaders out (deservedly or not), destroy their infrastructure and then pat ourselves on our back at the good work we do. Then a few decades later we're like FAILED…

Not an attack on you AT ALL but I reaaaaally dislike the phrase "failed state" these are countries that have been invaded, pillaged under collonial rule for 100+ years where racial and religious tensions were intentionally amped up by Europeans to maintain their power over the country. They only got their independence…

So he was dehydrated with a little altitude sickness thrown in. A saline drip and a chocolate chip cookie would have made him feel pretty good, too.

My 50-something pot-smoking pretend-hippie parents were all over this book a few years ago—way ahead of the Goopster. It was pretty embarrassing/ridiculous filling up a glass from the 5 gallon water jug — a jug which my father had in black sharpie scrawled "PEACE" and "LOVE" backwards on, so the water could "read" it.…

They're quite lovely if you change your mind and decide to look them up, sometime.

Are we looking at the same person? Because I don't see a "fat" woman. I see a woman. A woman who can sing, very, very well. Methinks the old stodgy critic dudes of London might be followers of the "not all men" movement.

"Details upon arrival"

It's now more than three weeks since I've heard from my boyfriend of eleven months. I'm going to send him this. But I'll probably add a little profanity.

You know this is the only thing that would have satisfied you:

I stand by my theory that the more people talk about their sexy times, the less they're actually having them. Ergo, Chrissy Teigen, just hush now, honey.