My front license plate was stolen last week and as I was filling out the paperwork for new plates, I gave serious thoughts to submitting 'AU COQ.'

Hope that second Phaeton photo is of the previous design because it looks like a Camry.

Exactly. My sister has a hardtop because, in addition to the weather issues, it would have been just asking to be vandalized in her old neighborhood. I briefly toyed with getting one myself and there's no way in hell I would have gotten a soft top living in metro DC w/no private garage.

When I was an age-group swimmer, my coach could whistle in a way that we'd hear it underwater. The rest of the rival coaches ganged up on him and got it outlawed. Since we were the hicks of the league, we decided to really own that label. So one of my teammates started bringing a cowbell to meets and we rang it…

It's really too bad they didn't call it LeBorg.

For me, the big difference is in the headroom. Forester is taller, Outback is wider.

And we 2014 Forester drivers thank you Outback drivers for being the CVT guineau pigs.

Nose says Ford, side view (especially the second photo) says Volvo X60. But the ass and interior are still Outback. I wonder if the 2015 Forester also got that new grille? Would be sort of surprising since it just got a new one. But at least it would be for a good (i.e. functional) reason unlike the plastic…

Um, Lincoln is supposed to be the "just like the Ford cousin but more expensive" option, not Land Rover and especially not when they're no longer owned by Ford.

Also, my freaking Forester has more rear passenger leg room than this monstrosity.

Say what you will about the old Disco's reliability (OK, it blew) but at…

I cannot stand cars that look like they're doing Downward Dog.

It kind of looks like an inverted version of the (shudder) HHR grille.

All that money and he can't afford a halfway decent haircut?

I used to say the 'M' in this case stood for Munstermobile.

For me, it's a toss-up between the Land Rover Defender and mid-2000s Discovery. I'd never own either (a. it's not like I could even get my hands on a Defender, and b. Every other post on my college roommate' s FB page used to be about her Disco's latest repair bill) but I still lust after them on spite of myself.

Ford Fiesta, duh. Their grenades will even fit in the cup holders. http://www.topgear.com/uk/videos/sens…

As if this hypothetical Disco driver would name their son Jimmy.

Walter White, is that you?

My family had the Astro's cousin, the GMC Safari in the late 80s-early '90s — a conversion van no less. It was two-tone green and we called it the Turtlemobile. I slept in it on the way to many, many swim meets (and napped in it my morning session was done and my younger sister's started). It met a tragic end in on…

My parents and older brother couldn't bear the idea of getting rid of our old '84 Indy Pacecar replica, so they kept it all these years. My mom is trying to talk my dad into rehabbing it. Maybe this will inspire him to do it.

"I'm chuffed to bits that Land Rover and Barbour are partnering. Now we can use the same tin of wax on the Rangie AND our coats!"