Pffft, come on, it's all downhill for the standardized test taking naturals after grad school; let them have their moment. No one ever praises me for my GRE score anymore!!! It's all, "Did you see that mural Judy painted?" "Can you believe Ryan's band is doing so well?" FUCK YOU Judy and Ryan, I got 5s on all my AP…

Can you expand on this? It was like a cafe au lait or something with a piece of buttered bread in it? Was it a regular sized mug with a piece of loaf bread? or just the bread soaked in coffee, like the ladyfingers in tiramisu. I want to picture and/or eat this!

Coffee takes away my appetite and makes me poop out everything I've ever eaten; I don't need to add butter or oil for it to be a horrific (but efficient) diet aid.

Eek, forgive my ignorance, but isn't the problem coming in the lack of distinction between sex and gender? Do birth certificates always say "gender?" Or do they say "sex?" I don't have mine handy to see what NC used in 1983. Wren WAS born with a female sex, though he was never female gendered. When one or the other is…

Ha. We're that random OK Cupid success story you always think must be fake. We were both only on it for about a month. He asked me out on a second date before we were done with the first, and we've never looked back.

I'm more educated and ambitious than my fiance and earn over three times what he does, but I've never thought of us in an alpha/beta way. He excels in areas I don't and if society called slightly different things "success," then he would be way more successful than I am. He's a teacher, being supportive and caring is…

I think my fiance and I have figured out the best of both worlds. We have sexytimes and do some cuddling, he tucks me in so I can feel the warm, safe fuzzies and fall asleep luxuriously by myself, and then he goes to do whatever night owls do for a few hours in the living room. When he's sleepy, he sneaks into the bed…

I will read your takedown after I stop crying at how sweet this was.

FAIL.

My mother is happiest when she is conveying sad news. She is the best, sweetest lady in the world, but you have never seen more of a gleam in her eye than when she tells someone the great, great aunt Gertrude died chocking on her own saliva after her throat muscles stopped working. I'm gonna be a good daughter and…

I've seen speculation that she was recreating this painting, "Mama Queen" by Annie Lee. Since the baby wasn't hurt, I'm filling this is the "weird, but not cruel" pile.

Way worse goof: My fertility clinic sent a "Happy Mother's Day!" e-card to the wrong listserv, so it was received by all the women who are still struggling to have babies (not those who have given birth, as they intended). I'm very early in my fertility journey so I just cringed for the sender and laughed at how awful…

No. S'mores and bubble tea are God's gifts. How dare you. HOW DARE YOU.

Oh, man, I HATED Tara. If I knew they'd kill her off, I would have kept watching. Timers to Netflix binge!

I'm 31, my grandparents are all 70-72. There are SOME benefits to being born into a family that pops out babies at age 20 (broke that tradition!).

Psssh, I am unimpressed. My dog rounds up the babies like little sheep. Carson wouldn't have made it 10 feet from where he was supposed to be before he got herded back home. Ok, ok, you're a good dog, too, Coop.

Yep. Little me was a close-minded bigot.

Isn't this just a "Scary Movie" or "Not another teen movie" with an awesome, amazing cast? I'm usually totally suckered in by an awesome, amazing cast, but I'm just not getting the appeal of this.

Great, except that I kept expecting Steve Carrell to make some crude "that's what she said" joke. Sorry, Steve, you've been typecasted in my brain.

No, I agree with you! I wouldn't have even cared if he said your words exactly "Your death will be no loss for humanity." I was just left with a bad taste about the dig at him being old and unable to climb a mountain. Just didn't feel like the highest road he maybe could have taken. *shrug*