They’re holding off until a team owned by a black guy tries to get funding for a stadium.

I entirely endorse calling it All Takes Matter, for what it’s worth. I’m mostly just obsessive about style guides.

Sorry, Kevin, can you clarify for me: It’s actually called Speak For Yourself, right? All Takes Matter is just Deadspin house style? I was sorta operating under the impression that’s the real name.

Tim, what are the criteria for voting? Is this worst owner of 2015/16? Lifetime worst ownership? Does getting a ring at all diminish the fact that Dan Gilbert should be in prison? Does it enhance it?

Tell us why your own personal “achievement” in said category deserves the W, and the tickets.

All 3 players the Bruins took last year

Christ these are all terrible. Maybe expansion was a bad idea after all.

Please never do that again

That dude was telling the truth. An adult wolf needs to assert dominance (not just a personality thing; only the most dominant in a pack usually get to breed), so mature wolves (about 2 to 3 years old) really do watch you for weakness, frustration, or even signs of pain. A weakened pack leader is an opportunity, and…

Drew, can I have your stuff once Peter Thiel has you drawn and quartered? I really just want the shirt from Chopped.

I’m not sure a Sherman campaign could get off the ground. He’s specifically instructed us not to ever talk about him.

Least Written Rule of Baseball

So THAT’S what I’ve been doing wrong!

It’s not a dead rat, so not interested.

Ohh! Thanks for clarifying. No joke there, I just didn't get it, and it seemed pretty obscure.

Worried the Jianlian reference is gonna go over some people’s heads. Like mine.

They’re moving across the Bay though, so maybe he’s just from the future?

I have the same concerns. The part that gives me hope is just that someone other than him poured some cash into all this, so presumably he at least has a pitch. Of course, he was a coveted free agent, so the investors could just be blind.

Patriots in 2007 because fuck all y’all.

I figured this was just gonna redirect me to Drew’s piece from earlier.