Schröder? With a name like that, it makes sense that he has experience banging on the keys.

The crazy thing to consider is that if Martin hadn't publicly quit the team, we'd hold exactly the same opinion of Incognito as we do now.

"Excuse me, what time does Twister sta-"

Diners, Drive-ins, and DIES!!!!!

Well, yeah, in general. But here, they would get the rebound easily.

If he misses he has 2 guys under the glass for the easy put back. With Curry shooting, and no defense under the basket, I'm betting the probability of scoring more than 2 points was fairly high.

The only thing you'll catch here these days is a groan-inducing case of appundicitis.

[Matt Schaub begins practicing taunting cornerbacks and safeties in mirror]

I thought his claim to fame was that people would mistake him for Uncle Phil sometimes.

"Weed? No big deal. I snorted coke in a player's dorm room."- Barry Switzer

Hey, now! Not fair. I had a box of crayons that had 7 colors.

There has to be a strip club in Portland call Oregon Tail, right?

I would submit pics of Antonio Cromartie's kids but I have to get back to work by Thursday

"I'm trying hard to like, blend in and make you look good. I have no idea what you're talking about. 'Duck Dynasty'? Oh my God. Oh my God. I'd rather have franks and beans, OK?" -Bernie Kosar

"There's no "e" in team."

"I thought he was on my team."

"Age is just a number."

Hey, don't embarres the guy.

So as a white person married to another white person I should probably NOT attempt to dress my son up as Baby Mike Tomlin for Halloween, right?