Hang Ten tank with Faded Glory jeans.

I love this so hard.

Good. I had this random woman at a school event tell me how subservient Asian women are because their men demand it. That’s why they never marry American women. Then my Asian-American husband joined me and I waved goodbye to her. It’s not just a black and white thing in this country.

Perfect!

University of Southern Cornholio.

Asian woman dilemma: If you’re quiet, you’re demure. Stand up for yourself, you’re a sexy exotic dom.

I want to be an Assassin American.

Mimi!

As another native Detroiter, it is actually 100% accurate. Assassin is also my 2nd job.

My husband’s ex was once harassed, “hey Ching Chong, go back to China.” She looked at the guy and said, “I am Japanese you fucking moron. Maybe you should crawl back to Norway.” My husband said that her matter-of-factness and lack of emotion totally stunned thus guy. He just said, “I thought you were supposed to be…

“Assassin american” :D

We had a pair of Chinese-American fraternal twins in my high school math. One was good at science and English, the other was good at math and history. They banked on the fact that people couldn’t tell them apart, wore the same clothes, and took tests for one another in their subject strengths. It was a whole four…

Starred for “assassin American”. I’m stealing this typo :D

Aw, shucks.

My GF is assassin American

Your tween kind of sounds awesome.

My GF is assassin American and when people ask where she’s from I tell them the stereotypes are acurate. She absolutely WILL cut you and light fire to your house, being from Detroit and all.

Bet she can’t wait to tell white guys where she’s *really* from in a few years.

Dude, we’re the country founded by Puritans.

Didn't realize that NAMBLA members read Deadspin. My bad.