The best players are the only ones with the leverage to demand insanely byzantine contracts.

Director of Internet Content for Sinclair Broadcasting.

Cause of Death: Bonks

They may have loved nature, but they very clearly did not respect it

Let’s not overlook how both of them tried to ditch the other at the first chance they got. He shoved her into the cop initially and tried to run out the door; she moonwalked right past him being arrested to attempt her Spider-Man gambit. 

“I’d have just shot the fuckers.”
-American police officers

It seems to me that you’re basically confusing shopping with Amazon Prime with shopping on the Internet. Did it really not occur to you that in the period of time you went from buying 2 items to over 100 items, that shopping on line just became more convenient in general? More selection, better prices, faster…

All wheeled things should be on the street, and they would be if drivers weren’t such fucking assholes.

Have you seen this?

The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt did a story line where NFL teams all changed their names to controversial topics to goose merchandise sales by people burning jerseys to protest.

My favorite was “The Seattle Oatmeal Raisin Cookies You Thought Were Chocolate Chip”

My parents run a resort on Sanibel Island, they regularly will collect all the shells left by people staying there after they’ve checked out and return them to the beach. People get caught up in collecting hundreds of shells, then end up bringing home perhaps a dozen or so. That beach is covered with shells.

Depends upon where you are. Many tropical beaches are composed largely of parrotfish shit - parrotfish crunch up coral but can’t digest the skeleton, so it passes through them (all crunched-up) and gets deposited on the shore. Other beaches are largely finely-ground quartz - sand, really. Even where beaches are…

Collecting shells that have been thrown up by the surf is one thing - the inhabitants are dead and the shells will probably be pounded to bits within a few years or less. The only ecological drawback that I can think of is that you’re removing potential homes for terrestrial hermit crabs. And as this article makes…

As a former resident of Pittsburgh, I can not only confirm that people wear Steelers jerseys to funerals, but also women dress them up to go out at night with black pumps and a tight skirt or jeans. Steelers jerseys are the little black dress for Yinzers... it’s difficult to explain to anyone that isn’t from there.

I hope Matt Ryan is forced to do a commercial where he talks about what a goddamn loser he is every offseason until he dies from severe rectal trauma. I hope they find a way to go 0-17. I will never forgive them for giving that game away. I AM FIRED THE FUCK UP FOR THIS.

Every time they trot that tired D out against Brady, there’s no doubt in my mind what’s about to occur over the course of the next 4 quarters. At least I can enjoy watching other Steelers fans’ expectations be crushed because they refuse to accept the reality despite it being pretty fucking regular at this point.…

The people of that city will buy you a salad with fries on it, and I just can’t handle that level of earnestness.

You guys kept running zone defense without a strong pass rush. Brady kills that shit. The AFCCG was clinical in his destruction of that D. Dom wrote a great article about it after that game (and he’s a Steelers fan and expressed pretty much the same emotions as you).

That’s very big of you. Most Steelers fans would never set foot in that shithole.

I have to say that Pittsburgh was the best goddamn NFL experience I’ve had in this country.
God bless that city and its bars of cheap beer, stodgy delicious food and people who were so friendly that I thought I was being conned.
I love that goddamn place.