I nominate the Pontiac Grand Ville, but only because it’s so awesome to see a massive boat like that being driven by Bill Hickman in the badass chase scene in the Seven-Ups!

Let’s see, I’ve owned:

I totally get that also. It’s an equally valid reason IMHO

Exactly.

I never owned one, but I used to see them occasionally when I lived in Berlin in the ‘80s and I always thought they were sort of attractive. It was surprising to see them at all though since the climate was truly not hospitable to these infamous rust buckets.

Hummer is German for lobster, so were they going for that sorta?

100%

Yes! “Der Motor läuft” = “the motor runs”.

Viel Glück mit TÜV und ASU! Hoffentlich läuft alles glatt 😎

This nicely sums up my feelings about my 2012 Outback. It’s a bit noisy, a bit slow and the transmission is god-awful. The styling is a bit awkward and the seats could be a bit better.

Good lord I hate these things. Vomit-inducing design.

I like shopping at Costco because of this policy. However, the number of fuckwads walking around with said mask hanging below their ultra-privileged yam-bags fills me with absolute hatred. 

Steve Inkjet Cartridge disagrees with this assessment.

I owned an Impala of this era and honestly it was a bit of a shitbox. Don’t get me wrong - I loved it, but it constantly needed stuff. EGR valve problems, bad carb, alignment always off and so on. And don’t get me started on that 305.

Yeah, this is not even in the same league as the Maybach.

I would not hate that. But my feeling is that it will be some dull little people-mover pod.

I do not have particularly high hopes for this. I seems likely to be some kind of underwhelming half-assed crossover. I’m imagining an electric HRV...

One could argue endlessly about the choices they made here, but considering the easy availability of better-looking period-correct H4 headlight replacements (e.g. Cibie) I don’t get why they would insist on these LED monstrosities.

Correct. This is literally just a list of ways to jazz up leftover pizza.

I’ve had to explain this to at least 3 friends who are low-information Cheeto Hitler fans.