Maybe I’m weird, but that’s not even close to my first thought when these monstrosities come up:

Unless the next guy is paying you for your girlfriend, that analogy doesn’t make any sense.

You on your Harley and Doug in his #dougcar can lament about how bad your last tow truck driver smelled.

Apparently neither Paul nor Doug have had the rubber part of a wiper blade torn off due to being frozen to the windshield.

There is nothing wrong with this bike. It looks cool, and is probably a great bike.........if it were maybe about *HALF* the price.

I look at the Baja and all I see is this:

It’s actually EVEN MORE awesome, in that it actually induces a sense of awe. Granted, it’s awe at the deliberate creation of utter hideousness - but it’s awe nonetheless.

I asked my brian if he was malfunctioning, but he said he’s alright for the moment.

Well done. You get a Clapping Riker!

One non operational jet insulting another?

“I see you’re passing the sound barrier”

Chris Christie clearing his colon?

You’re acting like I’m reaching into the toilet and splashing around everything that’s in there. I wipe my ass and leave. I don’t stand up, squish my cheeks together (WITH EVERYTHING IN THERE) and then attempt to wipe.

I swear if I ever hit it big enough to race my own super car at a rally, my only stickers would be a big “ME” next to a cougars face on the hood and a “I wanna go fast!” on the back.

JFC DON’T FUCKING STAND TO WIPE. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. HE DESERVED WHAT HE GOT.

That crinkling sound was him opening the crackers, which he then PUT DOWN ON THE FLOOR.

Who in the hell taught you to do that? You deserve what you got

Optimus Prime’s kidney stone. Excellent analogy.

Doug seems like the most unprepared man ever, haha.

I’m a something, Stef, can you Hellcat me?