... Everyone needs to know how to cook. What kind of jerk would give you a hard time about it? Unless you have a son who you’re militantly NOT teaching to cook, of course. (I assume this is not the case, because you seem like a reasonable human).

I think the answer is “children are not chattel, and homeschooling needs to provide an adequate education, verified and overseen by the government.” Otherwise the scum of the Earth can just scream “Freedom of Religion1!1" and do whatever with no-one checking to make sure they aren’t violating their children’s civil…

So are we supposed to be outraged by the school’s completely practical suggestion? Coz I ain’t.

Biden wants to means-test social security and thought Clarence Thomas’s harassment of a female employee was no big deal. O’Rourke is married to a billionaire heiress, doesn’t support universal healthcare or transitioning to renewable energy, and seems to be pretending to be Mexican.

Yeah, like... imagine if we lived in THAT timeline instead.

Nope. That would require that I watch the VMAs and have any idea who Jordan Sparks is.

You know, its actually kind of refreshing to see some members of the Y chromosome set be the ones with the purity rings and the weird hangups for once?

As I explained to my then-a-Republican/Libertarian-but-showing signs-of-recovery friend, most rapists are serial rapists. This was while explaining that the rapist to rape victim ratio in the population didn’t have to be equal to explain the number of women who have been the victims of sexual assault.

Wow, like, imagine if we’d had a robust and growing labor movement since the Regan era, instead of the opposite. This film would be prescient instead of still completely relevant.

In this case, if we eat the rich, we’ll definitely need to marinate and slow-cook in liquid. That guy looks hella stringy.

... I like you.

If you’re experiencing that, you should make sure to hydrate thoroughly with electrolyte-containing substances, and contact a medical professional if it persists for more than 24 hours or you experience other symtoms.

Paging Madame Defarge...

At this point, I’d be happy if they taught all genders basic human anatomy, health and safety, and how periods and placentas work.

Those people had personally been enslaved in Volkswagen plants. Not their great great grandparents. Their own selves. As in, this living breathing person standing here was almost worked to death, and many of their friends and families didn’t make it.

They’re right, we should definitely give Oklahoma back to the native Americans. With a hefty check to each person, since we can’t practically give back the rest of the continent.

World’s most punchably-faced teenager sues well-regarded newspaper for plastering picture of him looking punchable on front page!

Which candidate seems most likely to prevent us from spiraling into a dystopian theocratic plutocracy?

There really is a special place in hell for these guys.

Ew, ew, ew, ewwwwwwwww.