Oppressors always try to co-opt victimhood - no one likes to admit to being the villain, after all.

Aw, a multi-billion dollar corporation has to label boxes differently? How inconvenient. I see that really eating into their profits.

GMOs are one of the single most dangerous technologies for food security—and it has nothing to do with their alleged "safety."

I don't like your wife already.

Also, don't fucking buy a dog. Adopt a dog. Holy hell, it's 2014.

Probably a dog, if we measure in time from arrival to shutting the fuck up about it.

Counterpoint: Fewer babies.

Is this the famous "I.P. Freelee"?

Counter-point: Bananas, Pineapples and Cherries is also the strict diet that Pac-Man was on and dude is round as fuck.

Finally! A diet that is simple and practical for the common, everyday barrel smashing Gorilla.

My best friend and I have a tactic when we go to our favorite Indian food buffet (best type of buffet IMO). Firstly, eat a big meal the night before, but don't eat breakfast. Go for late lunch if the hours allow. Don't drink water, get a small bowl of the inevitable fruit they have. Grapes are the best. Satisfies…

I'm sure that her support of these geocentric anti-Semitic crackpots was actually Kate Mulgrew from an alternative, evil universe, and I am glad that the beloved real Kate Mulgrew has returned from her dangerous Mirror, Mirror (mis)adventure to set the record straight. PHEW.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Lesbian.

I don't think Jezebel trolls are exactly arbiters of what a "normal" life is.

Surprising. Less vaccinations would lead to more dead babies meaning increased rib supply.

"any other normal childhood disease"—you mean like death, which used to be a normal childhood disease before vaccines came along?

I'm glad she was okay, sounds like she will have a difficult time with an idiot for a parent tho.

This is really unethical of me and I still feel bad about it. That said…it is my only revenge story, and it is epic.

I want my baby back baby back baby back baby back, I want my baby back baby back baby back baby back... after it died of an easily preventible disease.