Don't you have an outfit that fits this description? I know that every weekend when I go out I'm wearing my most conservative mini-skirt along with my most demure fuck-me boots.

I really get the impression that he is more a deconstruction of "badass" characters than a "badass."

I liked this because it made me laugh, and it also made me ask myself if I have any friends I feel comfortable enough to ask them if they would bring me my pussy if my date is going really well.

Ummm... There must be a German word for the really complicated awful and wonderful laughing and crying I am actually doing right now.

Do you remember Wanda Sykes's routine about the detachable pussy? Would fit in perfectly with this.

Team Landlord.

The title of this article should be changed to "Asshole 20-somethings ruin landlord's home and don't understand what the big deal is because THEY ARE ASSHOLES"

Jesus christ. The gall on that woman sending you that email. How arrogant is she? SHE DESTROYED THAT POOR WOMAN'S HOUSE!

THIS. Also the people that place orders for 20 at In-N-Out.

I'm pretty sure the most annoying coffee order ever is the one where the girl from the office is "gonna pick up Starbucks on the way in so give her your orders!!" Order at 8:30 in the morning when you're trying to get some god damn coffee before you have to spend all fucking day at work but now you're going to be late…

At the beginning of this: Oh I like Bastille, let me check this out.

You can find a ton of their stuff on 8tracks.

There's a little Eminem, a little Lion King and some Billy Ray in that too... they make the whole horrible song into a poignant conversation between a man and a his daughter and they correct the grammar too. I love Bastille. (Album is only $6.99 on itunes right now too.)

I'm going to leave this right here. And you're welcome.

Now you'll never be able to un-see it.

You know, teenage girls post pretty dumb photos on the internet sometimes, but it's clear that they don't intend those photos to be scrutinized at family dinner tables and described in detail on blogs. Yes, they put those photos on social media, but clearly they mean them for their friends, etc.

I was feeling sassy-slash-pretty in a breezy white dress. Did I mention he was shirtless? My heart still flutters when I remember it.

Is there ever a time she doesn't look good? Bitch.

WHY? It's a baby. It doesn't matter who it's parents are - it looks like...other babies. I will never understand this.