tiger balm applied for mozzie bites and a failure to wash hands. Mistakes were made.

One of my cats melts like jello in a sack on a hot day when you hold him. When I'm alone, I dance with him because he lets me. He purrs like crazy and oozes about in my arms while the other pets look on like we're both nuts, but this cat is the perfect dance partner. He never minds if I miss the steps, and he's…

My first boyfriend (after I had been independent and single for years) told me while we were cuddling once, "See? Isn't this better than being independent?"

*That said, it's not like I'm going stop my husband from going down on me if he particularly likes whatever I make for dinner.

Oh, fuck off you gigantic piles of fucking shit for humans. There are goddamn programs to help with things like reactive attachment disorder and if you had contacted DHS with your concerns and let them know about the bind you were in, they could have helped you find appropriate support and probably worked along with…

As someone who was once called out by name in a Yelp review for being the WORST SERVER OF ALL TIME and clearly so unhappy with my job that I should quit immediately, I just have to say fuck these types of people. Thank god the owner of my restaurant was there that night and saw what actually happened or I would have…

Another pro-lifer GOP type who values life right up till birth.

I use "Awesome!" and "Cool!" still.

I think you forgot Concern #4: Yelp extorts businesses.

I demand a TLDR!

"Hell, imagine what would happen at any place with a corporate office: not only would the employee responsible be fired as fast as corporate could dial the phone to call it in, the customers would probably be given free steak dinners for a month and the right to publicly flog the restaurant employee of their choosing."

Hm. It's almost as though you think I, or my husband, give a fuck what you think.

Due to the overwhelmingly positive response to this post, here's a picture of us:

My best pickup wasn't even mine. It was my kid's.

On my fathers 50th birthday we threw him a surprise party. All eight of my siblings made the trip to be there and one of my younger brothers brought his then girlfriend and her cousin tagged along. I immediately noticed her gracefulness but at the time was going through the realization that I had failed at my chosen…

This might not make sense to some Americans or Canadians, but it is a big deal for a English girl - specifically one from Manchester. It is my dirtiest, most shameful secret, and one that made even my husband look at me with disgust.

It was a glorious summer day in drawing class so we all went out to the historical cemetery on campus to sketch. I was wearing a red sundress and I decided that I really wanted to get the attention of this one guy I'd been checking out all term.