[reads headline]

After the 2011 Finals, Chris Bosh gets zero benefit of the doubt.

Can someone file a restraining order on another person's behalf?

"Ehhh I'm not sure how tenacious those Tebow-ites really are"

Das a goo' wahn!

They'll go along with it along as they are not actively involved and subsequently caught with their pants down. [See: Ex-Laker, Chris Paul]

The Lakers' new[ish] TV deal essentially gives them license to print money and not give a shit about the new luxury tax, even with the new CBA's tripling of said tax.

"Will you stop Godding up those ball players?" How not to be a shitty sportswriter,

"If the Royals can chase down the Tigers, Joe Posnanski will get, like, three books out of it. And if they're stuck in fifth in three months? Brett'll say his hemorrhoids have flared up again, and Kauffman Stadium will slide deservedly into the Missouri."

A 3-5000 word column takes much longer than 10 minutes to construct.

"To me, Simmons condenses what his side of a common bar argument into a 3-5000 word column."

"I didn’t realize the effect [JFK's assassination] had on that city…I think from people we talk to and stuff we’ve read, the shooting kind of set the tone with how the city thinks about stuff. We were at Game [6]. Great crowd, they fall behind, and the whole crowd got tense. It was like, 'Oh no, something bad's gonna…

Oh I think he is aware of what he's doing; trolls always do. He gets off on treating tragedies like a game of corporate logo Where's Waldo.

The guy makes a living by pretending long division is insight. He is the smuggest Excel user of all time.

Thank you. Reminds me of football fans who say "we would have won...IF OUR TEAM DIDN'T COMMIT 65 PENALTIES!!!"

"If the Heat caught half as many beneficent calls as the Pacers did tonight, this would have been a very different game."

"Always kept quiet"

And everyone just knows that the Pacers are the media darlings over the no-ratings-Knicks! It's about eye balls, you guys!

"That was a terrible roughing call. What Keith did was minor and then he turned around and the Red Wings player nearly dumped him on his head with a push from behind."

"In the playoffs, you don't make that call."