I just feel so gutted about this and I have no idea why. I really liked his music but I’ve never felt so sad about someone I’ve never met passing away. I just hope his home planet knows how much earth will miss him, ya know?

Wasn’t even a price hike, it was a price DROP. By directly importing the tea from India to the colonies, and taxing it on the wharfs of the colonial port cities (as opposed to the previous methods where the tea had to be shipped to England first, the duty paid, and then it was taken to the colonies) The price of tea…

“What if I got my puppy from a breeder in Canada?” A small child asked in the crowd.

They are! WHY NOT JUST POST THOSE. The women in the original portraits are all absolutely gorgeous.

“One really interesting thing about Ben Carson is that he was actually on the Titanic and the ship was going down, and he thought that was it! He was a dead man! But then God time travelled him into the future to save him. You’re probably like to present day? But nah I’m going to add a bunch of unnecessary details…

The local Audubon Society is very displeased with the occupation of the refuge. I wonder if they could amass an army of 1,000 falconers. Imagine them all raising their arms and a thousand birds of prey take flight, darkening the sky. They’re led by 12 great golden eagles. As the birds approach, shrieking, the…

-1 False equivalence.

i think if i heard the phrase bean to bar irl i would punch that person in the face. like im not even mad at the fancy chocolate.

It was a bloodier time, brother against brother, sister against sister. For, you could trust no one and the nights were long and the days longer. The streets ran thick with Canola oil, the air heavy with the scent of white cheddar flavoring....

It does, actually. It’s like a very squeaky, very quiet fart.

See, I’m not a huge fan of dark chocolate so I probably wasn’t going to like it anyway. HOWEVER, it was free which usually equals delicious for me and even then...I wonder what “true” “bean-to-bar” (sounds like a move you can try with your vibrator) chocolate tastes like...seems like fancy=bitter as fuck.

I have a hard time believing that an artisanal, locally-sourced, hand-crafted, gluten-free, organic, bean-to-bar chocolate maker would misrepresent their product in this way.

Hey! Just an FYI - I bought a Brita in desperation for the office “White Elephant” gift exchange at my office on Friday and it was THE MOST stolen gift in the group. Just saying’ ...

My neighbors are vehement protestors. Did they help during my high risk pregnancy? Nope. Take my poor kids to the park to run when I couldn't? Cook a meal?? BIG NO. Did my pro choice neighbor come take out my garbage and rough house with my boys and do my dishes? YES.

“But still, I rise. Usually, around two in the afternoon. And once I pop a few aspirin and figure out where I am, I take an Uber home.”

Dear Henry, the guy who thinks he needs a“safe space” for white dudes: it’s called EVERYWHERE. Inviting more people to the table doesn’t make you unsafe, you sniveling privilegewank.

People seem about as determined to hoard their privilege as they are to hoard all the guns.

Flattering white jumpsuit are three words that have no.business in such close proximity to each other, unless of course you are talking about Barry Gibb or the 6 Million Dollar Man Steve Austin. Or the Pope.

Amy is wise. I would be afraid of an angry JLo also.