Why can't the simple answer ever be "They're just self absorbed narcissists with the personality of an in-grown toenail?"

Pantyhose and open toes? Someone's getting beheaded....

Really?

Overall lesson? Red wine has a hell of a PR team.

I stopped at "fixes everything."

My first thought was also "Rose McGowen is NOT one of the original cast!" But then I was just glad the article didn't mention Kaley Cuoco.

Being an Old, I am kind of pumped about this revelation. No one is looking at my weird facial lines anyway!

You leave Star Trek out of this!

THIS IS GREAT NEWS FOR ME.

This is really depressing because I have great face and a not-so-great body.

I was just about to comment about how boring I found this whole thing. The video, the song...Riley Keough is not compelling in any kind of fashion. Nah. Not about it.

Oh my God, the stupid. It hurts. These people are dangerous to society...

Fun fact: this lady is an anti-vacciner. That's all you need to know on top of this hot mess.

our baby Ulysses

Being the most insufferable white woman at a brunch, I'm guessing.

"Excess baggage"? PFfft. I should look so "terrible" as Charlize Theron does without makeup.

BUT THE PRESIDENT IS BLACK. WHY CAN'T YOU SEE HOW BLACK THE PRESIDENT IS?

Wellll in all technicality, Jasmine is Middle Eastern.