This is easy; just get the team behind the My Scene Hanging Out series. As a "G-Rated Sex and the City" featuring Barbie, it was flawlessly conceived.

Oooh, it's the headlines. Tweens are confused about how to capitalize sentences because of the conversational headline trend.

Who is getting paid enough in cupcakes to be able to even use these?

Opponents of e-cigarettes say the devices make smoking seem more socially acceptable. "We don't want to risk e-cigarettes undermining a half-century of successful tobacco control,"

That's what I was thinking. I get that to most people, stigmatized drugs = stigmatized diseases so they're not even questioning this, but how can crack pipes really be a significant vector for blood borne illnesses like HIV and Hep C? "Everything from flu, colds, cold sores, HIV" - yeah, one of those isn't like the…

i was about say; why do the editors keep trying to pretend this isn't the squarest site on gawker? they guys here aren't the audience for "idiot cops"

I don't think a lady would be an innkeep. But then, no one addressing a lady as "mi'lady" would be suitable for courting her.

Tesla doesn't count for not being affordable but Porsche does?

So what have you always thought "F.R.E.I.N.D.S." stood for?

it's a local grocery chain

I'm surprised that Adam Driver shows up, since it drives home the weird circumstance of him having a shoot of his own in Vogue first despite being famous because of this woman.

only if you're a narcissist...you don't really have to be.

oh i know, i just thought it'd be funny to say as i see comments like this all the time (just a little bit less straightforward). i.e., complaints that lead to the article that godfried wrote. they pop up all the time on jezebel posts about ryan lochte. irl i am a hottie and i have a boyfriend

he's soo good at playing Iago though. I watched some throwaway Disney's House of Villains thing were a bunch of random characters were thrown in, many played by famous people, and Iago actually really stood out, all these years later.

I don't know why, but as a guy, it pisses me off to think that women want hotties.

We get it, you don't get to have an idealized life. There are plenty of us that discovered multiple reasons that we're going to be left out the Disney track at different points of our lives. That's why something as inherently selfish as having your own biological kids isn't going to get any sympathy outside a narrow…

Women with functional uteruses can adopt too, but no one shits all over them when they have a biological child.

it was good cop bad cop

My favorite FCC complaint is the following about Family Guy. I'm familiar with the scene and saw it in the context of long having been desensitized to the show. You want to be all "ha ha, rubes" but when (accurately) described like the guy does here, it's really shocking that it was ever on broadcast television.

yeah, pretty exclusively. in fact, that pack in that short looked to be modeled on Marlboros; the "standard" now, but not then. they even addressed that in the show; Peggy was tasked with changing their image (as filtered cigarettes) from womens only to a broader base. EDIT: or maybe not; I can't find any reference…