It’s been making the rounds for a while now so you’ve probably seen it, but to your point:

It would be great if he trolled them by saying his favorite verse was Ezekiel 23:20.

“Donald, what’s your favorite Bible verse?”

“We love the evangelicals and we’re polling so well. This Bible was given to me by my mother, going to Sunday school. … So, we love the Bible. It’s the best. We love ‘The Art of the Deal,’ but the Bible is far, far superior, yes.”

I like to imagine he’s a very enthusiastic tour guide, or aquatic television host, and speaks with a fancy British accent.

They’re intelligent and super curious about people in the same way dolphins are. The’ve gotten such a bad rap from the Steve Irwin incident, which was just a tragic accident.

This meme just gave me life.

Hatred is embedded within each of us, rearing its head in the name of both the good and the wicked, and I’m beginning to see how hate can work in tandem with empathy—shaping it, giving it aim.

He’s so floppy! Or Wave-y? Kind of like the real-life and cuter version of the scrubbing bubbles guys. Whatever it is I’m in love.

This stingray is singing with the voice of a choir boy and no one will be able to convince me otherwise.

He’s cuuute! He kinda looks like a dancing pork wonton with googly eyes.

This will NEVER not be relevant. When Ryan Phillippe was in Cruel Intentions, his fiancee was reading at second grade level

Unwashed post-Crossfit taint Donald Trump*.

Anthropomorphic hemorrhoid and Flowbee enthusiast, Donald Trump

Look I have a platform! My beautiful sexy daughter and my chaste smart wife have been working on it all night. Wait a minute flip that. My smart sexy daughter and my chaste beautiful wife. That’s not quite right either...my sexy beautiful daughter-wife, anyways! We have a platform that’ll knock em dead (autocorrect…

Carrot Top’s bronze chamber pot, Donald Trump.

Emulsified carrot cake Donald Trump.

“the woman card, an all-powerful card worth 78.3% of a regular card”

Awesome turn of phrase.
(awful that it’s true. :()

Fun fact: In America we also have Freedom of the Press, which means you can’t legally get in trouble for beating someone to death with a rolled up newspaper.