Kids are simultaneously the smartest and dumbest people you will ever meet. My niece is 4 years old and cannot comprehend why we don’t eat ice cream for dinner, but knows how to unlock my iPad and buy an album of barney’s sing-alongs. Seriously though.

I thought this was the same story at first! Too bad none of my shitty exes were undercover cops, just shit people you can't sue for being themselves!

I would definitely hesitate.

This will sound douchey, but I feel like his response is the exact same response all people have when being asked if they want to meet the Kardashians.

Pft. Jesus loved sluts, he hung out with them. The Bible even says!!

Same with Texas. We make sure to spread the stories of guns and craziness to keep people away. Austin is the fastest growing city right now and with the job opportunities and relatively low price of living and reasonable gas prices compared to the rest of the country, if people knew how nice it really was, we’d be in…

My mom is also a fan of drinking, but my two experiences were during her sober moments.

I went through a punk phase at 14, so I wore some fishnet sleeves and lots of plaid, my mom asked “How much for a blowjob?” one night when I was headed to my best friends house.

This is hurting my heart.

The thing is, I know women just like that! They are so happy with receiving and not giving, which ticks me off. Maybe because I'm straight, I would rather give than receive because I can't imagine vagina being better than dick. But whatever floats people's boat, I don't judge.

Probably. But according to the majority, I’m in the minority with my feelings.

I don’t know, I’ve not been a fan of having someone go down on me but I actually crave dick in my mouth.

What a mess.

Just another manic EVERYDAY! Haha

This. I was having a hard time throughout the 90’s (mostly because I was in middle school and I just had a hard time) trying to articulate why I wasn’t majorly obsessed with her. This sums up my whole being. I feel like I can die peacefully now. I am also very manic today, so pardon my being curt.

Not Texas! Yay! Winning!

*takes a gulp of pickle juice*

I am in one of these relationships, even though I would be considered the more attractive of my pairing, I am the one to initiate and even get turned down for sex.

I dated a short guy. He was controlling, masogynistic, cheated on me for 6 months of our 2 year relationship (I dumped him the day I found out!) and when I got pregnant, he not only told me that babies ruin people’s lives (while pretending to be this big Christian dude), he also didn’t help me pay for it or go to the…

I feel for this girl because she was pressured by the micro society of St. Paul’s to do something that was not in her nature as a 15 year old girl.