"I don't care where I go, somebody hollers out at me 'I'm going to kill you.'" - John Chaney

"DUDE! ME TOO!" - George Zimmerman

Mike Brown had to find the budget to hire a scout from somewhere...

That "No slouching breasts rule" should apply to the actual Bengals players also:

This guy is 4-0 and considered a top prospect. Over 50 fighters have turned down a fight with him. He's not some random Twitter user. Terrible reporting

If parallels are being drawn between Jeter and Jesus, then surely Cory Lidle is Pontius Pilot.

“Oh, my glob? Look who I just found!"

Announcer 1: A triple cork 1080 with the mute grab AND the iron cross! Pulls it off? HE DOES!

Actually the rumors are linked. When Weeden learned they were bringing in a younger QB in Manning to the organization, he knew it was time for him to leave.

Here's where the game of Internet Telephone begins

You've just described Bleacher Report's business model.

I wonder if the individual countries that make up the African continent ever get pissed that no one mentions them by name.

FOX News citing a report from Mr. Seymour Butz that Orr said "Purple monkey dishwasher"

Toto told to 'go back to Africa' for encore.

Give the guy a break. It was a stirring rendition of the national anthem. — Knowshon Moreno

As the chick in this video, all I can say is that running in powder when there's no one else out at night is a shitload of fun. But stopping to pose for the local news station in the middle of the icy street hurts like a bitch. Glad it's as funny for everyone else as it was for us.

"Amateur."
- Kool Aid Man

The Black Book Of Big Quarterbacks, on the other hand, is much shorter but no less thick, as it deals mostly with Jared Lorenzen.

Aww! Another happy ending!