It’s not like their new corporate overlords are Walden Media or some other shit. Guarantee you someone at the Univision HQ is, right now, snorting some horse tranq off a bare bottom while a midget blows a bugle. And that’s just the weekly update meeting.

The plotting itself in Act 2 was pointless. What Rian Johnson was trying to do (I’m not sure I totally agree with his decisions) was take the usual harebrained Star Wars convoluted Hail Mary hero plan and make it fail. And fail spectacularly.

What is “The Point”? Genuine question, since somehow, “sexual harassment exists on a continuum” is apparently the wrong take.

I read that damn article 3 times specifically looking for that phrase and did not see it. Apologies!

Comrade, Colonel Nolan wishes you to accompany him to the reorientation camp in Kamchatka where you will learn about the dialectical materialism, yes, then, comrade, you will see the error of your ways.

“Tried to sell it as fact.” My goodness. I’m not sure why you saw me use the term “tell” and assumed that I intended it to mean “a rigorous scientific proof of dishonesty,” considering that’s literally not a thing that exists. But just to be clear, I only meant to share an informal opinion about human nature as I’ve…

Lifetime pension for ten years of work? THAT’S a crime.

LOL. I’ll get right on that, just as soon as I finish revising my paper “How to Tell Whether Someone You’re Talking to at a Party Is Bored with the Conversation: A Data-Driven Approach” for the journal Belaboring Every Human Interaction.

Garnered? 

If only Selena Gomez had turned down this role, that sexual abuse that happened 25 years before she was born would have never happened.

What’s plagarism? Is it like edting?

Hi

And also, in both cases but especially the latter: there is so much damn porn out there, wouldn’t the person who found it have to have been *sort of* looking in that vicinity? Like, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t stumble across “secret peeing footage of someone I know” if you were looking for “wholesome dildo usage by a…

That gear was at Performance Developments in LA. He offered to help out and show me how to use some of his equipment. I am a Firefighter.

Not a joke. I’m just dumb as fuck.

I’m just excited we’re moving back to a simpler time. A time before vaccines, a time before pasteurizing milk, a time where we can’t treat simple infections with anti-biotics.

The only way I can think of a way that’s both heavy handed and cheap as chips as expected from state sponsored propaganda, is to label the island as Taiwan,

The special kids in class, the ones the teachers let clap the chalk board erasers clean outside, still laugh at this joke. It’s good to humor them every now and then.

Jalopnik doesn’t exactly cater to the brightest auto enthusiasts. It’ll take them a while to catch up, if they ever do.