GLORIOUS REMOULADE, WHY AREN'T YOU SOLD AT TRADER JOE'S?

I am definitely, no question at my least ethical, patient, understanding, and loving in the morning. Example: on the morning after Jay Leno's last show, Mr. Wont is watching all the tribute recaps on the news and getting teary-eyed. "He really was a great guy I think," he said. My response was instant: "Good…

I liked to set up homes for each of our Barbies, and then pretend they were all in different countries, and then have each Barbie drive to the airport, get on a plane, and visit each other. I also played college with our Barbies nonstop. I thought all our Kens were so ugly, except for the Aladdin Ken, but omg so…

lol, obviously we're both really annoyed! I totally agree he is playing dumb in some instances...I think maybe, with the "what does that word mean?" thing, it's a stand-in for intimacy and he thinks it kindles the women's maternal, explanatory feelings...? I dunno, I was also like "how the hell can you have gone to…

Oh yeah, Clare is psychopants central and annoys the crap out of me, but she still didn't deserve to be shamed like that from a guy who was all like "No kissing no kissing! Oh wait except for you...and you...basically I just didn't want to kiss THAT GIRL." And he totally uses his daughter as an excuse, I think, for…

However she spells her name, it's definitely Sharleen. She straight-up said she was leaving in the last episode. Also can I just express how incredibly disappointed I am in Juan Pablo? I was so excited when I found out it was him...then after a few episodes I kept insisting to myself that it was only the language…

Jez, making light of that kind of thing is the exact reason it still happens. I mean, whoever wrote/edited the ad obviously hasn't ever had anything slipped into their drink, and I'm real happy for that person, but it has happened to a big chunk of the Jezebel audience and you might want to be more sensitive to that.

We used to do this in high school, only with Jeff Goldblum.

This is one of my dad's and my favorite movies, and a big part of the reason I love survivalism/mountain men/pioneer history/etc. You tell mrbytherecordmachine to watch his top knot.

Is this from Jeremiah Johnson???

Well I'm beginning to see the light.

This is a fantastic point.

Usually upon sighting Robin Thicke, I will very enthusiastically start in, with full tremolo:

My mom has Blurred Lines as her ringtone and told me her favorite line is "You're the hottest bitch in this place."

That is my biggest pet peeve about publicly abstaining from sex until marriage: it achieves the exact opposite of what it should. Presumably, you're abstaining in order to shift the focus of the relationship from sex to God or whatever, but the sex they aren't having ends up being all that is talked about the entire…

=/ I fear it may be an iPhone app only?

I use Clue! I like it a lot, it isn't pink. One of the only apps out there that isn't suffocated with flowers and sparkles. I also use it to keep track of sexytimes, and because of the app I discovered I am now roughly synced with the moon since getting off hormones and on ParaGard.

If by "better" you mean "so horrible and frustrating that it inspired me to just like give up for awhile and stop looking which of course is when I fell in love with a guy I met IRL at a bar years before and we had only ever been good hiking buddies, and we ended up getting married," then yes.

Oh goddamnit I just posted this image. Foiled again!