Playing Candy Crush with those nails; so meta!

I see candy patterns and detonate specials in my mind, in the last moments of consciousness before sleep.

I am literally cutting out candies and printing out pictures of specials right now, because I am doing a Candy Crush door for our office door decorating contest.

Actually, if you keep Candy Crush open and flip back to it real quick so it changes to "Full," then flip back to settings and flip the time switch back to automatic before you start playing a game, you won't even get that deficit.

Seriously, this is precisely the kind of date night I'd be having if I had their money. STARS THEY'RE JUST LIKE US.

"I did it for journalism."

Sometimes I feel like I'm a radio antenna that's picking up everything around me, and when I feel like that then yes, everything makes me cry. But I'm not a parent; becoming one, I hear, really kicks that feeling up a notch or hundred.

PEACH CHAMPAGNE WHAT?

Champagne, my favorite! How did you know??

My personal favorite Walk of Victory was in Berlin the morning after a pub crawl. I had followed an adorable teddy-bear of a guy back to his hostel, taking little note of where it was. In the morning, fresh as a daisy, I pulled on my sweaters and pants, wiped off my undereye mascara, waved goodbye to my paramour,…

How timely. I was just discussing the "walk of shame" last night with Mr. Wont. He looked at me like I was speaking another language; "You know, when you have a one-night-stand, and you have to walk home/back to your dorm room in your going-out clothes the next morning?" "Oh, you mean the walk of victory."

"Girls at the Jack & Dry came and went, but Jack and Vern never did stop loving each other."

Me too, love a good Cab Sauv. But speaking of whiskey gingers, have you guys tried the White Rabbit Jack Daniels special-limited-edition whatever-the-fuck? IT'S GOOD IT'S SO GOOD.

Bahaha whiskey gingies, I love it! I call them Jack & Dry, because I'm particular about my Canada Dry. Also because doesn't Jack & Dry sound like a brothel fronting as a laundromat? Hilarious.

Love zinfandel! Should we just call it ZOC, zinfandel of color? That and Pinot Grigio are my faves, but lately my dailies are Jack Daniels & ginger ale. Because work is icky and pretending our apartment is a bar and my husband is the bartender is an unfailingly fun way to goof out of any negative work + commute…

This is the truth of all truths. ETA: double post. Jesus, one post about wine and Kinja's drunk already?

This is the truth of all truths.

ENFP: Champagne. Accurate! It is my favorite. However, it's impractical. One can't exclusively drink champagne because if you celebrate everything you celebrate nothing.

My local news channel literally had someone on saying "My Rabbi once counseled Jack Ruby, so stay tuned for my interview with Jack Ruby's Rabbi!"

Cool! Weirdly, there's another comment discussing Jack White here...Jack White's record label reissued the record Texas Funeral a few years ago, which WOULD have been cool if Jack White wasn't such a jerk and his label run by such yo-babe jargon-speakers who spend all their time avoiding paying musicians.