The other person Charles would like to kill is the executive who decided the McRib should only be available for a limited time.

They are looking to hire Mark Mangino because they heard he had cheese fountains at Kansas.

I am guessing they are going to need an old piano crate for Andy Reid's casket.

we've been making wraps in Lebanon forever

Sadly, JoePa was trying to dial in to the conference using his blender, so he was unable to get the news directly.

He's lucky. If he had stuck that fork into a yellow teen, it would have been a hate crime.

It's the heart of America

For some reason I imagine JaMarcus on the other end of this couch in the exact same position.

Even if you disliked the Italian style of play, you couldn't help but root for Toto.

The Chicago media is going to crucify DeJesus for his wife's actions.

If they were trying to be characters in Reservoir Dogs, Jay would definitely be Mr. Pink.

This guy is obviously disturbed. He listens to Colin Cowherd.

estimated $7.9 million in net assets

When asked for a quote, Rolando said "Robble robble".

McClain was hoping his sweatshirt would have a zebra-like effect and they wouldn't notice him inching towards the door.

maybe also a magical unicorn at shooting guard, which is just as realistic

Bernie is definitely a dead man walking.

The saddest part is that his dyslexic parents named him after the city where he was conceived.

Delonte West also had a question about economics, and he decided the answer should be to stockpile huge amounts of guns and butter.

shortcenter.xxx was just purchase by sleazy eastern Europeans and is now the midget porn HQ.