Just another example that the Penn is is mightier than the sword.

Bernie Kosar's flowchart always starts with Jim Beam and ends up in the gutter.

drank his beer, ate frozen pizza, surfed the internet

Unfortunately Joe's code is in Morse so no one actually understands it.

Now get ready for 4 months of debates over what "most valuable" really mean.

For his bad behavior, Dancing With the Stars' Maksim Chmerkovskiy was only fined 1 pig last season.

The "head" coach will continue to be Pi Phi president Amanda "The White Swallow" Hutchins.

Cracked Ribs, Staph Infections, And Poked Eyes: Three Things I Would Rather Experience Than An LSU/Bama Rematch In the National Championship Game

If the Kennedys really paid that much attention to wings and propellers, JFK Jr would still be around.

After a 12,000 foot-long adventure, Andy Reid's plumbing had to be completely replaced.

Gillum did add that there was one other silver lining the child alluded to, and that would be Sandusky's taint.

Going back to the 1970s to investigate a child sexual abuse case was also Mike Meyer's premise for Austin Powers 4: Dr. No Means Yes.

+1

Pictured: Two gaping cunts.

"Mocks and Jocks" was the suggested attire for the Steve Jobs themed sex party.

I don't get it.

Just cements my theory: never trust a guy with two first names that are spelled weird.

+1

After finding out the two accusers are step-brothers, I can only picture them as Dale and Brennan.

I feel Rex Ryan was out of line when he called his defensive game plan as a "total abortion".