Not surprisingly, Leif Garrett's offer to drive the LA Galaxy's bus to San Jose was denied.

I envision NFL security sorting through the thousands of dong shots on Daulerio's hard drive, giving up halfway through, and extending their middle fingers as they walk out shouting "Thanks for nothing, asshole."

Round it off to five, why not.

That picture will look great on my "Tribute to Vegetables" wall in between the posters of the Jolly Green Giant and TJ Lavin.

having given four tubby stewards the runaround

Even Mike Vanderjagt thinks this guy is an idiot kicker.

It's like what Sandy Duncan saw after she got poked in the eye with a sword on the set of Peter Pan.

Her lawyer? You guessed it.

If you were going to use an textile analogy and base running, I think "Teixera's slide into 1st base was as smooth as sandpaper" would be more appropriate.

I haven't seen a Fisher move backfire like this since Amy failed to finish the job on Mary Jo.

I haven't seen a video of this many guys going limp since the Tranny Suprise series from Bang Bros.

@bevraj of choice: +1

The mascot was later charged with resisting arrest after he grabbed two policemen by their shoulders and put them to sleep.

That video was much more entertaining than the one involving the Scotsman scoring a foal.

I couldn't care less about either. I watched Real Housewives of Atlanta.

Hey Denard, you might want to take up baseball, too.

Lee has been great, but Junior Seau thinks there is a more formidable Cliff out there.

The San Francisco Chronicle's in depth reporting paid off when they got Ross' road beef to admit he only lasted 8 seconds.

Larry Eustachy took his R Kelly impression a little too far.

Lenny Dykstra just added "Marry Tiger Woods" to his list of investment strategies for 2011.