Setting: The rolling central Plains. The sun is angling down lazily, gently cutting through a wafting breeze. The grass rolls gently in this warm embrace, and the suddenly crunch of crisp leaves and shoots is heard. Camera pans stage left.

So, Cory Collins who died of a heroin overdose is thoroughly mocked, because, Juggalos, right? But yeah we're all sobbing into our lunch over Cory Montieth? One junkie was rich, so lets mourn him. Gross.

I think I saw this one.

Practicing now for February 2nd.

Wait, why is Emma Roberts getting a space on Jezebel without (negative) commentary? Didn't she beat up her boyfriend - like literally bloody him? She's a Chris Brown and we all know Chris Brown is safe just about nowhere in online media circles. In fact, I'm pretty sure the story broke over on Gawker a while back and…

IT'S CUTE WHEN WHITE PEOPLE ARE INVOLVED. IT'S SCARY WHEN IT'S ALL BLACK PEOPLE.

I'm a Philly guy. Not Sal from South Philly, but I was born in the area and have lived here my entire life.

Of course, he was "catfished" by an older woman: he's got no clue what a grass on a playing field looks like.

A confused Greg Oden looks down. Sees it hanging down midshin. Picks up patella

You do realize the only "evidence" of this is the claims of the one person left alive from this encounter? I have no doubt Zimmerman was getting his ass kicked by the person he deemed "suspicious" and decided to pursue because "these assholes always get away". How was he not following when he EXITED HIS VEHICLE…

I looked up the video of Howard's reaction, and it brought me to tears. Stay strong Howard! You're better than them!

I'd make fun of you for being such an insipid clown and point out how few similiarites there were between the murder of Oscar Grant and the conviction of Rae Carruth, but after reading your other hollow, idiotic posts that represent your malformed and pedantic opinions, I suspect the one major similarity - that they…

My favorite stat that I dug up to see just how pathetic the Wizlets / Bullards have been - they last won an NBA championship during the Carter Administration. Since then, the Lakers have won more titles than the Wizlets have finished .500 or better. They've had fewer winning seasons than the Lakers have won titles.

I'm a reluctant Wizards/Bullets fan, so, I pretty much just drink to forget. The draft is just a distraction from the pain.

Did anybody actually read the article? The tattoos are just a red herring; He suggests that Wall doesn't deserve a max, because of his lack of development. Wall's strategically placed tattoos come across as an attempt to emulate Durant's thought about visable tattoos and a clean-cut appeal, while Wall fails to realize…

Antoine Walker: the Carl Weathers of the NBA.

See? They should sit in the ba... [chokes on homemade pork rind]

Truly is a thing of beauty.

Anyone else fucking sick of GEICO's viral marketing?