Well, that’s not nice. A micropenis doesn’t make a man unhealthy.

Yeah, when the dude slams into your cervix and still isn’t balls deep, you learn that length ain’t exactly all it’s cracked up to be.

Ryan Murphy has said, in essence: “I didn’t want to bother her.”

That’s some bullshit and bad research. Why wouldn’t they consult her? I hope she wins quickly and spends it all in glorious excess.

Sorry but this story is shit-stirring and mean.

Eh. My mom got the sweetest dog at the shelter about a year and a half ago, and eventually he turned into a growler and a biter and a dog with food aggression. Through multiple trainers and boardings, she’s finally looking to re-home him. It really does happen.

Full sincerity here; we’ll miss you and your writing here. I’m continually sad to see so many brilliant writers leaving this place, but I understand. It’s tough watching this place get slowly defanged and made increasingly mainstream and Voxian, but damn if you all aren’t magnificent at what you do.

“She’s being more careful this year. She’s learning.”

The fatality comes with the 7:00am text the next day: “Sweetie, do they still call it the walk of shame?”

It’s the “Don’t wait up!” The pics and “Made some new friends” would have been funny, but the punchline is fantastic.

Blackface is something specific. I’m not really supportive of it’s continued expansion into more and more situations.

I can honestly say I have never in my life ever spent one second of my life concerned about someone seeing my butthole during sex. It has never even entered into my mind.

Good. I hope the judge sides with her. I hated these “stories” when they came out and thought they stank of jealousy—and I never blame jealousy for anything. I strongly suspect that they went after her because she was hugely successful, definitely plus size and unapologetically sexy. Everyone knows that actors fluff…

Dear America,

Me, I’m partial to someone with a keen understanding of how our government functions and prior experience, but I’ve always been an odd duck.

Johnson also told Fallon that he thought voters were looking for “more poise, less noise,” and “better leadership.” He believes his mass appeal comes from a combination of early rising, supporting the troops, and being a family man.

Dwayne, a half full tube of toothpaste could beat donald trump right now. Let’s not get hasty.

You just don’t get it, Dani is not only going to make it to seventy, but dammit her body isn’t going to change! Actually developing intelligence and character is just too hard, while defying physics is easy!

“That was absolutely wrong and not what I meant to do,”

What is it with other people being so goddamn shitty about other people lives and their lifestyle choices? These are the same people who can’t imagine a married couple being childless by choice. Not everyone wants the same things in life but that doesn’t mean their lives are without content.