What really annoys me is when I get to the airport and I have to pull the plane out of the hangar by myself.

Dear Watt, I wrote you but you still ain't calling

Feel encouraged?? I just found out an unbelievable athlete is not only fitter than me, but also smarter. Tough way to start my 9-5, Barry.

"To clarify, I utterly respect and appreciate every police officer that protects and serves all of us with honesty, integrity and the right way. And I don't think those kind of officers should be offended by what I did."

I'm sure that officer understands, wherever he is.

"What a great holiday season! You gave me this bear, and just last week Dan Snyder gave me this blanket!"

the part where he says that head coach Marc Trestman's latest comments "put the apostrophe" on the season

...he says that head coach Marc Trestman's latest comments "put the apostrophe" on the season

Salvage title I can live with. The stank of hockey equipment, no.

Oh man, you vegetarians and your kale.

With as much as ESPN likes to kiss the NFL's ass known, the fact that ran such a story would seem to suggest that they have it solid.

Edgy.

I know they look funny now, but who's going to be laughing in 3 weeks when these guys are the only players left that haven't been forced into early retirement after catching Autism? These guys, that's who.

Yes, fuck these assholes. It's the law, whatever; grandstanding it makes them assholes.

Let me get this straight, some kind-hearted Jaguars fan went out of his way to make sure that this couple didn't have to spend a weekend in Jacksonville and somehow he's the bad guy?

You're right. Get bent.

Honeycrisp apples are the new chipotle peppers—something really good that's going to be put in everything and thereby ruined forever.

No shit, of course Shocktop sucks, we didn't need you to tell us that.

At one point in my life, I was a professional negotiatior. (Okay... I sold cars.)

Very subtle what Goodell did here.

All of the shapes were used in the creation of this front end