The presumption here is that a player should be evaluated by a reporter based on said player's ability to produce wins. Why?

I love the Hudson Valley. Miss it, even from central CT.

I'm sorry you had to grow up in Catskill. As a Kingston native, I was always quick to remind my fellow residents that, "Hey, at least we're not in Catskill."

His body type is a lot like Mike Trout's. So much rotational force from torquing that huge torso.

That was the best single season by a pitcher in baseball history. With a 1.39 FIP, it ranks #3 all-time in FIP.

Cops are shitheads. It's almost a prereq of the job.

Did you miss the one above him that calls for a mouthful of cum? I mean the guy's (or lady's) name is "hotcocktranny."

Gotta manufacture that consent.

After the press conference, Goodell casually chatted with reporters about his recent movie-watching, describing Raging Bull as "a near-perfect depiction of romance and love between a man and his wife."

The spreadsheet start date is likely not the beginning of her disinterest, and certainly not the beginning of his frustration. Having evidence like this is the easiest way to ward off the age-old argument stopper: "What are you talking about?" It may seem frigid, but I've been both plaintiff and defendant against the…

"Everything You Know Is Wrong" is my favorite They Might Be Giants song. And I actually like They Might Be Giants.

Will Leitch could probably make a living as a professional fart bottlist.

Weak draft class? This was supposedly the best draft in years. The Spurs got a Magic Johnson clone at #30.

What is bad karma?

You're welcome. Now quick! Back to the White Noise cultural studies table in the cafeteria!

ding ding ding

Should I dismiss it before reading it?

Is that something that you can put on your tenure hearing? Like, a graph from Google Trends or something? I wish you all the best in that endeavor.

Is this really a song that warrants a thinkpiece? This?

A dental office that doesn't care to keep good track of its painkillers.