I can't even follow this article so I sure as shit can't follow a twitter feed.

Alignment problem? Or...alignment NOT problem depending on your mood!

LOLZ!

WHY WHY WHY DO WE HAVE TO HAVE CLOTH?! WHO THOUGH THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA?!

Ok phew! Would read.

Needs more velociraptors.

Try duck genitals too. Those are equally as fascinating!

But to then not call the police immediately? Unless you drove around looking and she had already been found and you're just freaking out...still...yeesh.

“Dirk and Chrissie?!” Nature’s way of saying they deserved broken ankles.

Ehhhhhhhhh

But isn't most of the hate stemming from her racist, homophobic, and clasict statements caught on tape? That doesn't seem so much misogynistic as it does...logical and humanistic. Am I missing something?

Rights are like fairies. Every time a gay right is granted, a straight right loses its wings.

“You having rights takes away MY RIGHT to prevent you from having rights!! Get off my lawn!”

If “I SAND by Ted Cruz” means “I would like to suffocate Ted Cruz under a ton of sand” then I proudly sand by Ted Cruz as well.

Even if the bible was true about the age of the Earth, the bible itself has 10,001 types of marriages.

Do freckles count? If so, I’m SUPER polkadotted.

Basketball shorts! I die!! My husband wears those all day every day...meow.

Blog posts are pretty selfish by definition but I doubt this was required reading for your 7th grade english class. You could always, ya know, not fucking read it if it’s so disturbing to you.

I got 1/3 of the way through. Never have I ever felt so uncomfortable with the whole “comedic face of pain” trope before. It was way overdone.

I am from near Philly and say karl-mul when I say things like caramel corn or caramel apple but I say cara-mel when I say it by itself. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯