Distance happened.

You can also yell at people to call the sauce “Gravy” if you want to be a spectacular asshole.

Where the hell are your socks? If you don’t have any because you are wearing sandals, your feet are already gross anyways.

No, I just don’t like having to vacuum and mop all the time. Taking off your shoes at the door helps immensely.

Counterpoint: continue outsourcing our tales of woe (it’s always woe) because they are nearly always interesting reads.

Oh c’mon now. There’s no reason to be unkind. The comments are such a lovely space for dialogue - why cast aspersions? Besides, it’s Friday!

You only do it missionary with the lights off right?

As a former lingerie sales associate I can say some of this is good advice, some of it is not.

This is a joke, right? I just missed the punchline?

If you buy your lady some nice lingerie, I suggest buying yourself some nice shorts so when your women walks into the bedroom wearing the sexy outfit that you're not standing there in your skid marked BVDs.

1. Feed everyone a large dinner.
   

I’m not color blind. But as a white person, I don’t see color. I just go with the flow of traffic and then complain about it later, to like minded individuals.

It just may be that Drew is referring to the possibility of Christmas Day and New Year’s Eve falling on the same day, were the “last Friday in December” rule instituted. Maybe. Just possibly.

Judging by the bio, Hardy has animosity toward anything with a period.

If you’re walking around a subway terminal shouting “CMON CMON CMON” in PHILA-FUCKING-DELPHIA after an Eagles game, you’re either:

“Kind of talking trash.” He was walking around yelling “COME ON NOW” in Philly, putting his hands up and basically asking for a fight. He even grabbed some random girl’s hand before someone decided to knock him down. According to the guy who was there, this man was doing this throughout the whole subway ride and after…

I have some context: The NFL is trash and so are its fans.

No respect from Eagle fans, don’t they know the red jersey means no contact?

Luckily you’re known far and wide for your excellent commenting, so there’s that

This better?