I think companies really need to get out of the habit on firing people because the internet demands a sacrifice. It only encourages people to continue using toxic behaviors to push their agendas.

Would be nice if they’d just open source it and leave it to the community to manage. Even if they had to gut some of the integration with Google services to make that possible, there were a lot of great desktop capabilities.

Screw lights. What we need are loudspeakers, as the autonomous cars drive by, they yell “EXTERMINATE, EXTERMINATE!!!”

They never took a doggie bag home and they never touched Golem Jesus’s meal.

As a fellow stay-at-home dad, can we please get some motherfucking changing stations in men’s public restrooms? For fuck’s sake.

I once joked with a friend that I should write a cookbook called ROAST THAT FUCKER!, which boils down to "You basically cannot fuck up any vegetable if you large dice it, put it on a sprayed cookie sheet, cover it in spices, and stick it in an oven at 350."

Parents Night is dreadful. Last year I was singled out by a teacher in a room full of judgmental parents because my 3rd grader, for the "art show", drew a picture of a chicken giving a horse a hand-job. Seriously. I have the photo prove it if you provide me with an e-mail to send it. When I got home, I feared…