I agree, that’s a hell of a way to end that (otherwise overly sappy) scene

My understanding is that Rand Paul actually cuts his own hair. Not joking. It’s part of his whole libertarian/self-sufficiency thing.

It’s cute and thoughtful that you guys included Illinois on the list.

Just win some fucking games.

This whole thing is such a win-win for people like me who hate Brady and Goodell.

No, no, no, no, no: Original, Xmas, Europe, and we disavow Vegas entirely.

The sledding scene in Christmas Vacation takes the entire movie down a full letter grade. The attic scene where he watches super 8 footage of a childhood Christmas takes the film down an additional half letter grade. It was a solid B+ otherwise, so I’m grading Christmas vacation (which we watch every Christmas) a C.

Five more teams to beat the fuck out of Illinois. Great.

recounts the unbelievable pressures placed on Pan as a “golden child,” the daughter of Vietnamese immigrants, mother Bich Ha

This is exactly how the Broncos lost the Super Bowl in 2013: they failed to touch the end zone.

Five years for horrible joke. Time served, though, for all the people who aren’t getting it.

She should tell people it’s the chemically impossible compound O2H.

So so so so so so so so so so so so so important.

Inaccurate, but extremely funny.

Bullshit. Peter Berg fucking slayed in A Midnight Clear.

Awesome. Short stop is one of the most difficult (and important) positions: requires a very strong arm, a lot of speed, excellent fielding, and in a game that’s known for being slow, it is (aside from batting) the one position that requires split-second strategic decision making. The second baseman (or woman,…

Here’s a sentence-by-sentence breakdown/tally of how this registered on my “Racist Richter Scale.” Points are awared on a scale of -10 (extremely inclusive) to 10 (extremely racist). 0 is neutral.

“I’m not a lawyer...”

TRICK QUESTION, GUYS: A REAL AMERICAN MAN DOESN’T CHANGE THE TIRE, HE THROWS OUT THE CAR AND BUYS A NEW ONE.

I grew up in NJ. For years there was a sign at the state line that said “WELCOME TO NEW JERSEY” and beneath it, in graffiti: “NOW GO THE FUCK HOME.”