Nahh, he does it all for the nookie.

Federica Pellegriniis trains using a new technique. She trains in a pool of carbonated bubbly water. Her coaches claim the water is naturally sparkling, but we know the truth.

The fact that he was falsely accused of a crime is just further proof that Whitehead isn’t Cowboys material.

*receives pink slips*

I’m starting to think public financing for stadiums/arenas - pro or college - are a bad idea. Thankfully, here in Detroit, the city is financially sound and the public schools are in great shape, so I’m not too concerned about giving a dead billionaire hundreds of millions of dollars for a new hockey arena.

Always remember that whenever a city makes a terrible deal to pay for a sports arena, there’s a good chance that the deal will only get worse as time goes on.

Yeah I’ve had sex too, but I don’t throw a press conference to announce it. Act like you’ve been there before, man!

We’re drawing too hard of a line for today’s athletes on what’s acceptable and not. For instance, I saw a video from the early 80's of Terry Bradshaw filling a car with 5 cases of beer, racing a Hawaiin Tropic themed race-car from Connecticut to LA, being chased by the police, and wrecking into a swimming pool.

Someone sent me this article because my dad was actually the co-counsel for the defense of Daniel Green, which was not the best position to be in as a 10 year old because the DA’s kids got to meet Michael Jordan and I didn’t! Anyway, Green got life and is seeking a new trial

It is worth noting, however, that this diagram only applies to square sandwiches, leaving subs out in the cold. Perhaps Richt will come out with an addendum.

You’ve really got to stop trying to fuck Cousins like that.

Judge Kara Brown, ladies and gents.

Decided that relationships don’t have to be difficult or painful to be deep and important.

I coached youth soccer this spring and had no idea we were supposed to have orange slices at the games, same for my co-coach. He and I just laughed it off and the kids didn’t seem to care. I then got three emails from moms offering to coordinate the orange slices for the rest of the season.

As a sports dad, I loathe the “snack schedule” email from the team mom. We can pack our own snacks, thanks. I don’t need to be one-upped by the Pinterest mom from hell. She can bring her kid his own snack in a bio-degradable bucket that also serves as a coloring book, an SPF 45 hat, and a carrying device - all with…

Those neighbors are awfully righteous for people whose fences are made out of dildos.

“No, no, no, no. Lemme show you how that’s done.”