How do you fit 4 elephants in a VW? 2 in the front and 2 in the back.

Basically, it’s when sun and moon are aligned in the sky at night

Are the writers here just bored anymore? Doctor of opinions over here trying to fluff that paycheck. Imagine thinking using periods right now in the world is an issue that warrants this type of write up...

Mushrooms and other fungi are packed with bug life!

Pole vault.

And according to homeopathic medicine, that makes the water more effective.

Nonsense! Cream cheese frosting or GTFO.

Taint that the truth.

Yeah, that’s definitely a picture of a sunbathing asshole.

Yeah I think I’m gonna get a flu shot still. Been getting them since I was 11 and have been fine.

Wait...Where’s the step where you just let the dog lick your hands? Have I been doing it wrong all this time?

Um, wouldn’t all the abandoned trains blocking the tracks make the rail system useless?

I feel sorry for anyone who needs this.

If she was really interested in her education, she could find a good community college, do well there and transfer to a university after a couple of years. I’m guessing that won’t happen.

Sorry, this lady may think she’s running like a horse, but it’s definitely more like a gorilla. Horses don’t cant to the side a bit so their legs don’t hit...

Aww hex, I’m #008000 with envy that I didn’t think of it first.

I was trying to think of an Amtrak joke, but I couldn’t stay on track.

Have you ever offered cash to someone and have them not greet it with absolute delight? Guessing not.

Using Android Messages app on my Galaxy S7. I type a text, I press the send button, the other person gets my text. This works either on my phone or in a Chrome tab. Not sure what the problem is.