Those selections are a bit weird, but I'm sure there's a good reason, like that's what the Tarot cards say or the pig blood splattered on those places on the map.

@ilovetofu: Yeah, it's a feature you can upgrade to for a small fee. For an even greater fee a service can exact the revenge of your choice and send you a video, or let you direct in person or by webcam.

@xd.Balls: If it doesn't send a valid status update in a set interval, an alert gets sent, too. So you'd have to fake that. It's easier just to find another victim that reminds you of your last victim. I mean it seems like it would be, um if you think about things like that, heh. Mommy didn't love me

Next, it becomes a mandatory implant for certain crimes, then more crimes, than any crime, like you're finger printed now. Then just to have a drivers license, like in some states you're finger printed now when you get a driver's license. Then the implant is an optional convenience, like for keeping track of kids or…

@chefgon: It is rough, the cold sweats before a release, being in constant darkeness about new products, the late night screaming and crying. Being constantly abused and ridiculed by anti-Applites and Apple Genius'. I have half a mind to give up Apple products. Come to think of it I simply have half a mind. If only…

What's this "Verizon" you speak of? Jason, did you forget to spell check again? (Any carrier that doesn't carry the Jesus phone doesn't actually exist in the mind of a true fanboy). So there's no iPhone Verizon in the horizon to keep our eyes on?

@Segador: And they were great with strawberries and maple syrup. Oh, we needed that for evidence? Sorry Captain.

@ithyphallus, 13382: Where did we meet? But more importantly, what were you doing in my house?

@tucker augie'ben'doggy: That is weird. Maybe you're doing the ritual incantation wrong. Are you using fresh pig's blood?

@SeventhExile Speaks: Its true. Some call it the Electronic Baby Sitter. In this day and age of both parents working or only one parent in da house. When the parent(s) are home, they need some childless time for whatever or doing home chores. Not cosigning it, just pointing out the difference in circumstance. Why? …