dammit, now i have to think favorably about humans again

I just feel like at some point even idiots realize the sky is blue. I’m an optimist I guess.

Well now I know why they call it King’s Landing.

I’ve lost two jobs solely based on the reporting of my case.

As someone who spent many a day running the trails in the park next to our apartment in Denver while dodging massive, never-ending piles of goose shit...

I have no stance on eagles, beyond the opinion that they should spend more time killing geese.

The best way to avoid swallowing fish bones is to pick them out before cooking,

“I didn’t see the dog murdered. I heard about it. I don’t like it. But my people are passionate and some of these dogs, look they’re bad dogs, and my followers are passionate. They’re passionate about America. And a lot of it, most of it, is a beautiful thing.”

Roger Goodell decrees that henceforth, players shall not receive neck injuries, and any player caught suffering one will be fined under the League Personal Conduct policy.

Roger Goodell promptly responded to this crisis by decreeing that all turfed fields should have the ability to lift up to sweep an incapacitated player under.

Take my advice - propose to that girl that hasn't left you yet for being as into pro wrestling as you are.

How about using his mugshot like every other major news outlet?

A post has been making the Facebook rounds about a woman who sends pictures of her shits to guys who send her dick pics.

This woman is a true hero. I should celebrate by sending her pictures of my genitals, right?

I don’t understand why this isn’t addressed by the GM and/or owner? You know it’s a problem. It’s always been a problem, so find a solution. The team already has someone steal the red challenge flag out of his pocket without him knowing in the last 2 minutes, so he doesn’t throw it and get a penalty. Why not demand…

12. Mace Windu redirected the Force lightning back at him.

Dude. ISIS is coming for you.

wait so this editorial board works near some of the richest people in the country in the OC so does this mean that they also can be paid $0.50/hour