I hope the letter writer is seeing all the eye rolls here. I have an ex like this. I was going through a major family emergency (family member sentenced to prison time). My partner was really self centered and would criticize everything I did (ex. how I poured water from a Brita filter into a glass). Partner blamed me…

I love when exes assume everything is about them. My ex assumed I was still in love with him because I wasn’t dating anyone.

I mean I feel like there’s an intermediate opinion here? There are some very legitimate criticisms of American capitalism.

This is one of those times, I really, really, want to hear from her perspective. And, maybe have her read it, on video, and record his reaction. Though, this individual is so far up their own asshole I’m not sure they’d actually hear anything she said, and instead only hear the words that validate their perception as…

Can you please write this advice column instead of the current writer? You have alot more sense and perspective. 

Did the letter writer lie? If so, then they did a shitty thing. But I can’t tell if they did or not.

Gave bad advice and missed their ex and wanted to get back together again because they were feeling vulnerable isn’t that shitty on the shitty-ness scale.

It sounds to me like the real issue here is that you mentioned…

This reminds me of a call I got from an ex-hookup a year after no contact who was SO remorseful and SO sorry and couldn’t SLEEP when he thought about how badly he had TREATED me when we were DATING...I didn’t have his number programmed any more and literally was like “....who IS this?”. Trust me bro, you probably…

I love your post. I had a similar sort of thought. Perhaps she never married because she was like “man relationships can be bullshit sometimes... why would I make it hard to extricate myself”. Perhaps she doesn’t particularly care about children. I have a pretty high stakes job and right now I slog on because I’m in a…

Thanks for that perspective. I guess we never really know what the other person is experiencing and it can be grandiose to assume. I think that having a heart-to-heart conversation is important in clarifying that.

It’s that same vibe of the dude who hurts you, and then immediately turns it around about how sorry he is and what an awful person he is, so that you’re supposed to end up comforting him instead.

Letter writer cannot forgive themself because they probably desperately need to feel relevant and effective in some ways, even if they’re bad ways. You want to believe you are important and you actions matter. Your actions probably did matter, but it’s not okay to put this all on yourself with no agency on the part of…

THIS! It was bragadocious! 

this guy’s an asshat feigning penitence to brag about his power over one woman. assholes are a dime a dozen, but it takes an extra special one to write a letter like this. 

“many of the women in the seduction courses are paid actresses or models who were paid to be on camera.”

i think this is the thing for me about a lot of guys who complain about not getting women. they want women that are very conventionally attractive. nearly everyone can find someone to sleep with, if they want to. but that involves being as accepting of the other person’s normal looks as you’d like the other person to…

If someone thinks their “core problem” is they are not getting laid, then they haven’t gotten to the root of their core problem. PUA “techniques” are a mix of anodyne shit anyone who just wants to get laid could figure out (dress nicely, try to be interesting, approach a lot of women to increase your odds), and toxic…

I’ve always bern awkward and not very social. I just learned to talk about it. Frankly, it has gotten me second dates because women found it refreshing to meet a guy who wasn't a dick and was okay with being vulnerable.

They’re bad at flirting because that would require equal footing with another human. You mention reciprocal banter and increasing interest. These dudes want to skip that step and get to the part where they have sex/a mommy-wife as soon as possible.

He must have a great orthodontist.

I wish you knew how little we think about getting laid when we put on makeup and high heels.