Next question.

Aggro-Americans

Saw “drenched in poodle sperm” and cracked up.

“It was totally consensual, and my ‘staff’ always travels with a serviceable volume of chlorine bleach.”

I once left a large pot of stew on the stove at too high a heat; then I got wrapped up in some other activity, and the stew cooked down to a stinking hard carbon blob, stuck to the bottom of the pot. It was single-digit dead of Winter. I filled the pot with water (just to stop the smoking) and set it out on the back…

I was on the fence about 36 years ago, came down on the “nope” side, and have never regretted it. My wife of 26 years, on the other hand, was always on the “nope” side—the stone cold nope side—and she has never regretted it either.

Make a sculpture out of the cake pans.

Pro tip: NEVER BUY A BOAT!

The West is tilting Right, period. We’re seeing the makings of Fascist coalition all over the globe. 

No, it’s not an issue. A concealed weapon is a concealed weapon. By your logic, if he’d been carrying a handgun, it would be no big deal, so long as he hadn’t used it. I could kill you with a 2-inch pen knife if I cut your throat with it—true—but it wouldn’t be easy. A 6-inch knife penetrates to reach vital organs and…

I’m surprised the number for NC is so low. I know (of) people in my general area who have small arsenals and caches of ammo buried on their property in high-quality coffins, but these are gun-range habitués and black-copter believers so...

for some reason they aren’t called a cult.

Time is a flat circle.

Brazilian Rosewood is a protected species and cannot be exported. If it’s used commercially the stock has to have been brought into the country before the ban.

Never watched Roseanne, but old enough to have watched Bewitched when it started.

Like “Bewitched”  

8. K2 overdose (she thought it was crack)

I feel bad that I don’t feel anything. 

Or... they all crowd into the elevator, which, overloaded by their collective weight, crashes down to the ground floor. Final scene: The elevator door is closed on the ground floor, the sound of the crash, and a believable amount of dust puffs out around the edges of the elevator door.