The modern day equivalent is that horrible goddamn ventriloquist with the (what is it, like 8 now?) shitty puppets that stopped being funny in 1991... So glad I can’t recall his name, but he keeps popping up in media throughout my life... 

it’s like a low level nascar race where most of the cars have already crashed and the last two are leaking oil and body panels

President Biden has removed a button from the desk in the Oval Office that summoned a butler to bring Diet Coke.

Any House staffer that slips that ‘typo’ into the censure paperwork deserves Biden’s first medal of freedom.  

Refer to the hopefully-soon-to-be-censured congresswoman as Qaren.  Has a good ring to it.

No need to crap on Torch’s dream.

This was Italy in the 1970s. I’ll let you make your own judgement about steel quality. 

Meh, let me know when you find a bullet-proofed Brubaker Box.

Yoda should have been made out of felt.

Thanks!

At least the Beetle is attractive, imagine someone bulletproofing a Yugo.

Houndstooth upholstery.

It could be outrun by a glacier.

with an extra 660 or so pounds of armor added, I can’t imagine it’s going to be able to run away from anything

Damn, this is so crazy, only about 25 million people will believe it.

A recent selfie.....

Hey Q-Anon Losers,

This woman deserves a lifetime award in comedy. I snorted up through my nose milk I drank in second grade.

“Wake up,” another wrote. “We’ve been had.”