Chalking tires is just another form of excessive white-on-black policing!

I mean, if they were going for “murderous street sweeper,” then they nailed it. 

Let’s go! Pedal through the metal!

Tacos are not donuts.

Italians fixing potholes? Old news!

Off Topic but I watched TPM on mushrooms and it was crazy as fuck! And Darth Maul scared the shit out of me.

Later, sober, I watched it again. So there really was a 2 headed announcer that sounded like a massive douche bag. I was hoping that was just the drugs.

I had the same thought. Unfortunately 200 Touring makes no mention of rust - so we can probably rule out our friend Mavid as a potential buyer. 

“Hold my Baguette”

This is the Fancy Kristen we miss and I can’t get enough of 

Well, LYFT always wanted to fuk UBER, so I guess they found the best way possible! “Ha Ha.  Try to get public now, losers”

When your mind says Weinermobile,but your budget says Vienna Sausage...

Magazine?

What are we, Amish?

Agreed, but I think it’s a testament to how truly awful cyclists are that the machines would choose to start with them.

If you can’t fix an Alfa you shouldn’t drive one

(With Apologies to Norman Greenbaum)

If it can power itself into a normal seating position now, that would great.

They know what they have. They’re not going to let that go.

GM Part Number: 71435862 - Grill Mounted Selfie Stick

Sounds like a just out of warranty Chrysler product 

Isn't it the goal of every male to have more junk in his frunk?